build myself up -cyrus-

[Jordan Gurisco]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,10,true][atrb=style, background-color: #423c42;,true][cs=2] & YOU'RE NOT EVEN HUMAN ` YOU'RE JUST A LOVELY IDEA OF ONE WHO I ACCIDENTALLY LOVED AND GAVE EVERYTHING TO BECOME THE GIRL ON THE PIANO BENCH SINGING ALL OF HER TEARS - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - away
[atrb=width,240] i build myself up, and fly around in circles.. lyrics, they were only lyrics but to the young teen the meant so much more. she did know who she was, but everything seemed so blurry, she seemed to be falling into a simple yet extremely complex way of life. pummeling herself down how she wasn't pretty, how she couldn't even talk to anyone, and even that she couldn't sing. well, jordan did take the singing one back every time she thought of it. she could sing and she knew it, that was something she felt nobody would ever take away from her. to say long story short, she was her own bully, the only one who said anything bad about herself. loud voices bounced off the hallway walls and into jordan's eardrums. the beat of their footsteps wasn't even steady or in any rhythm, they all sounded like wild horses running, just about into a beautiful beat but right outside of horrible sound. it drove her crazy, absolutely crazy to have to listen to these people talk about nonsense like the newest clothing line, or the cutest guy. the young quiet girl didn't voice her opinion. no, she kept it welled up inside of her and never let it go. most quiet people here had horses to talk to, yet those huge animals scared her. they could kill a person without a ingle wisp of a thought and haven't an idea what they did. it was a valid reason to streak away from riding in her eyes, but in the more daredevil people found her to be a wimp. jordan didn't care what others thought of her, she was already in a war with herself so why multiply the enemies? class, you dump girl! get out of your little world. the thought rallied her mind, it was nasty yet effective for jordan. her mind returned to her surroundings, backpack in hand, locker open and posed for a small click as she gently pushed it closed. turning around the girl fixed the pack into place one her back, fitting like it had done for the weeks that she had been silent at canterwood. few people had struggled to talk to her, one of them had struck out and branded himself into her head. she remembered everything about this boy, his dark skin, black hair with a graceful sweep of blonde. yet most of all, his intense brown eyes. jordan found herself thinking about him, fare to much but what else did she have to do, when studying became to much and with her extreme turtle behavior, there wasn't mach to do. something warm and tall knocked her out of her thoughts. waking her brain from it's ever so welcoming thought mode she gripped her lip, seeing her books scattered on the floor, along with another person's. looking up she noticed who had bumped into her. or had she bumped into him? darn her thoughts for clouding the present out. tears brimmed her eyes, as she glanced around watching as few people chuckled and others watched her with eyes of envy. envy? why would anyone envy her? she had just knocked into someone who was, well... looking at the boy who had been on the other side of the knocking into, she found herself holding in a gasp. he was extremely beautiful. full rounded eyes witch could take a girl's breath away with one glance. sculpted face witch completed his eyes. he was looking at her, probably wondering why she hadn't said 'i'm sorry' or something like that. she could say much, in fact this wasn't new to her, not saying anything was her shell, not making eye contact was her way to closing the world out. but her she was, starring him straight into the eyes, mouth closed and not forming words.	[atrb=width,140] words , 645 words tagged , cyrus notes , :3 muse with jordan is always fun.
[cs=2] TEMPLATE BY CALIFORNIA DREAMING OF CAUTION 2.0

[Cyrus ❤ Kat]

I know technically cell phones weren't allowed to be used, but I felt like this was considered an emergency, "Uh, yes hi. This is Cyrus Buchanan, I own Fox over at Canterwood Crest....yes, that's correct. He threw a shoe over the weekend, I was wondering if he could just get completely reshoed? Yeah, thanks. See you then." And like that, it had ended, and not a teacher in sight to tell me other wise. A sigh escaped me, glad I got that done and out of the way, it had been bugging me but it seemed that when I had always called, they had been busy. Not that Fox minded, I'm sure he was enjoying his little vacation from working, and my horse deserved it. There was no doubt about in mind, especially having to carry that girl back from the course to the school.

Sticking my cellphone back into my hoodie pocket, I slowly started to move my way onto class. Navigating the hallway with ease, I nodded my hellos and smiled on occasion to random strangers or people I actually knew and in return, they did the same. Going here for a few years now, I had remained the same throughout my time. I never tried to move up or down any ladders, I stayed in one place with my particular group of friends. While they, themselves, preferred to only talk to once another, I was the odd one who still managed to break out and act like there was a world beyond the circular table that we sat at in the Cafeteria. As my mind wandered, and I went through the motions, my attention span began to lack a little, but it came snapping back when I ran into somebody.

There was a loud thud when our books and papers fell now, sprawling out across the ground. I merely stared at them for a moment, feeling a tad bit awkward that I hadn't been paying more attention. Around us, there was a hushed silence before I could hear some laughter and everything went back to normal. Glancing at who I ran into though, I glanced down at her with a mild curiosity as she stared up at me. It was odd how she didn't say a thing yet she was able to hold my gaze. After a long and silent moment though, I finally spoke, "I'm so sorry," I started now, not bothering with hiding my minor southern drawl, "I wasn't looking were I was going, completely spaced. I hope you're alright." Offering a smile, I crouched down and started to gather her books for her.

WORDS: A lot
TAG: Jordan
NOTES: I’ve lost who I am.
LYRICS: Florence + The Machine; Cosmic Love.
TEMPLATE CREDITS: TOMOLONIS of Caution 2.0!

[Jordan Gurisco]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,10,true][atrb=style, background-color: #423c42;,true][cs=2] & YOU'RE NOT EVEN HUMAN ` YOU'RE JUST A LOVELY IDEA OF ONE WHO I ACCIDENTALLY LOVED AND GAVE EVERYTHING TO BECOME THE GIRL ON THE PIANO BENCH SINGING ALL OF HER TEARS - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - away
[atrb=width,240] how completely and utterly horrible this was, she couldn't move, or even utter a single word. the young girl's mind was racing as she tried to move her unresponsive limbs, and lips. he had started talking, even if it was the smallest bit, jordan still felt horrible. she couldn't, it was just the eyes, the eyes of everyone that acted like chains. weighing her down, keeping her from doing anything. why couldn't she be one of those beautiful outgoing and clever girl's in her books? the ones who would take this moment to their advantage and make some sort of joke, laugh it off and continue with their life. all jordan wanted to do was run away, let her skinny feet take her to her dorm, where she could lay in bed and dream. dream that she wasn't who she was, that she could talk to everyone she met, even that she could hold her own in some sort of argument. but she was here, and running seemed to be pointless due to the fact that the boy had started picking up her books. gripping the lower lip, she merely knelt down and let on a small smile, glancing once at the boy and uttering few words. "it... it's alright, i mean i'm alright. and i wasn't watching where i was going" she pushed the words out, they came choppy and a bit awkward. she tried so hard to sound graceful, if only she could sing to everyone, let talking fade away and let the wonderful sound of vocal cords working in a motion to make beautiful sounds. yet, she still wouldn't be outgoing, her words may be great and a small bit breath taking, but she wasn't about to be ms. talkative. grappling the present, the young girl continued. "it's all my fault." jordan mumbled, but she didn't just mean the books on the ground, witch she now seemed to be picking up his. the girl meant why she was so shy, it wasn't entirely her fault but try knocking any type of sense into her mind. you would need some large mario hammer or some threatening. it was her ex boyfriend's fault that she was who she was, he had loved her to pieces then just threw her to the curve. like she wasn't anything to him, jordan had devoted every ounce into the relationship with that boy. every fiber in her being was stitched to him, she (if you can believe it) had been a bit outgoing when she had been with him. to everyone she was a joy to be around, but thanks to some cheerleader who just pranced in and waved around her beautiful blonde hair, scenting the air with expensive perfume. jordan's love had been taken away in a matter of days. it wasn't just her heart that had been broken, but her soul, her being had been broken. her nature was to hid in a shell and act like a scared turtle, witch she did.	[atrb=width,140] words , 645 words tagged , cyrus notes , :3 muse with jordan is always fun.
[cs=2] TEMPLATE BY CALIFORNIA DREAMING OF CAUTION 2.0

[Cyrus ❤ Kat]

The girl seemed to be in some sort of shock, or at least, that's how it felt. I only stared at her. Was it something I had said? Did I not sound sincere enough? No, that couldn't be it. My parents had raised me to be a gentleman, it would be rather horrid if I just let them down in this single moment where the running into had genuinely been my fault. All around us, people were still watching, staring. I didn't know why though, as far as I was concerned, the show was over for them and there was nothing left of interest to watch. My eyes left her and moved towards the others now. Embarrassed by their staring, some of the girls started talking to one another again, and washed their snickers away for now, and the guys started lumbering on down the hallway again. Whatever had been on their mind, I was certain it was over for now, and I wouldn't hear about it until next class period.

In fact, I could see the headlines right now, 'Cyrus Buchanan knocked over a girl' okay, maybe not. Even that would be a little mellow dramatic for the students of Canterwood Crest. I would certainly be out of the firing squad range, that much I knew. For this girl, I couldn't be quite so certain. She was so quiet, but I hope though, that they would leave her alone. This hadn't been her fault, it had been mine. Picking up her books though seemed to snap her out of her state of terror as she knelt down besides me and seemed to be picking up my own. At her words, my shoulders slumped in a shrug, I didn't really believe that for a second but some girls just wanted to believe what they felt and usually, there was no getting around it. Under her breath though, I could hear her once again muttering about how it was her fault.

My eyes caught sight of the books in her hand, and I was trying to think of something comforting to say at the very moment, but the words seemed to escape me in my time of need. I never thought people should feel like they were alone in the world, shy people were often like that, but they shouldn't. All what they needed was something that made them confident and that could be anything. Maybe she already had it though. My hand reached out and slowly grabbed my books for her as I extended my other with her own books and held them out for her as if they were a prize, "Hey," I said, offering her a smile, "None of this was your fault, it's mine. I shouldn't even be talking on the cell in these hallways anyways...I'm Cyrus by the way. Cyrus Buchanan."

WORDS: A lot
TAG: Jordan
NOTES: Wow, that took forever. Sorry!
LYRICS: Florence + The Machine; Cosmic Love.
TEMPLATE CREDITS: TOMOLONIS of Caution 2.0!